Outside The Line

"Guardians" In Almost The Platonic Sense

Nice to see the MCC showing an open mind and allowing Kevin Pietersen to play his switch-hit lefty circus shots. It didn't require much courage or foresight on their part to see all the possibilities inherent in the new accelerated medium, ... but still, a tip o' the hat to them.

I'm just waiting to see if any critics of the decision come out and publicly denounce Pietersen himself "for forcing the laws to be changed just for him" or something of the sort. I doubt they will, but I remember hearing those same charges often labeled against Muralitharan, back in his peak controversy days.

I do wonder if there will be a double standard there, because their cases are virtually identical -- both players caused officials to amend the laws of the game, not because they were breaking them, but simply because they stood outside them. They showed the law books to be insufficient, incomplete... and they showed us how far the chasm can stretch between what we think we know about the game, and what we actually do know.

"Only The Peril To Your Pride"

And so, about three weeks too late, Muttiah Muralitharan nabs the record for most Test wickets. Here's a prediction: Shane Warne will come out in the next few days and make some controversial comments, or write an inflammatory column, or get himself busted texting some underaged school girls after a heavy night in town. Anything to get back in the spotlight. (He might get his wingman Terry Jenner to start things up, after which Warne will be asked by the media "to respond to Jenner's allegations," or something of the kind. You watch.)

Anyway, to commemorate Murali's feat, here's my take on the great man, from a few months ago.. 

Also (via King Cricket) a descriptive account in the Guardian of what it's like to face Muralitharan in the flesh.

All He Did Was Show Up

What did Muralitharan do? I don't get it. Was it something he said? Maybe I didn't catch it. (I've been busy working on some long, esoteric undergrad essays recently; it's quite possible that it could have slipped past me.) All I can remember is him minding his own business, trying to get back to full fitness for the upcoming international cricket season. Then one day Sreesanth started talking shit to the Australians on the field. Then Harbhajan joined him. Then the Australians talked back. Then some Indian fans were photographed letting out their Ids on Andrew Symonds. And now somehow Murali is going to have to grin and bear the racial abuse of the entire hill section at the Adelaide Oval? I don't quite see the link.

(Congrats to Jason Gillespie, by the way, for helping fuel the fire of idiocy that is steadily burning around this non-issue. Thanks, Dizzy – you can now go back to loading Wolfmother's road gear into the tour bus, or whatever it is that you do with your mullet time these days.)

An outlaw on the rise...

I have to admit, during the recent Ashes series, I held a faint hope that England could somehow scrape out a draw in the end (I was never delusional enough to think they ever had a chance of winning), only because I believed that could have triggered Shane Warne’s return to one-day cricket just for the World Cup. Between his Leviathan-sized ego and pathological sense of competitiveness, I knew Warne would never have allowed himself to end it all on a sour, or even unresolved, note.

Now, I’m not sure if that would have meant he’d come back from retirement for yet another pyjama party, or simply grind it out a little while longer in Test cricket until he found that perfect “This Is Your Life” moment on which to leave. But I think the odds would have been high on an ODI-comeback, due to convenience and timing, if nothing else.

Even though his presence would have made the task of beating Australia a whole lot harder, I still wish Warne was here for the World Cup. I know it’s been said many times, in many ways, but the guy really is a sporting genius. It’s still a joy to watching him weave those intricate webs of deceit around unsuspecting batsmen. But more than that, I just love the practice of spin-bowling in itself -- it is one of the most unique and captivating facets of cricket.

Random Notes on a Truly Consequential Match

It wasn't even full. The stadium, it wasn't full. That's the image that struck me the most from the India v. Sri Lanka game yesterday. It wasn't India's umpteenth under-whelming performance in a major tournament, or the clinical flamboyance of a Sri Lankan team that is looking more dangerous and more confident by the day. It was the empty stands. Queen's Park Oval is not a huge venue -- it holds about 25,000 on a good day. We are being told all the time that India is home to the largest market and the most rabid cricket following in the world, and yet you're telling me they couldn't manage to pack a few thousand bodies into a picturesque Caribbean ground for the most important one-day game their team has had since the 2003 World Cup Final?

So now both the big Asian teams are gone, an outcome some might call disappointing if it wasn't at the same time so predictable. Does it really matter though? Probably not -- the Pakistanis have way bigger issues to worry about now and can't seem to want to hop on a plane out of the continent quickly enough. The Indians haven't looked like they could threaten New Zealand, let alone Australia, in years, so an early exit at least helps to keep their national agony prompt and gives them a few extra weeks for the inevitable processes of soul-searching and re-building.

Anyway, here are some scattered live observations made during yesterday's massacre:

-- Here's a great (non-bowling) reason why Muttiah Muralitharan is such an entertaining, indispensable character in world cricket: after he took a blinder of diving catch to get rid of Ganguly, he threw the ball in the air to celebrate, like all cricketers are wont to do; but then he got scared that the umpires might believe he threw it up too early and without being in full control, so he ran in the opposite direction to re-catch the ball, went for another full-length dive and ended up dropping the ball comically. The ball was definitely out and all his teammates were already running in to congratulate him, but Murali ended up looking like a little kitten who kicks a ball of yarn but then gets surprised by its movement and starts chasing it frantically. Priceless.

-- Arbitrary ICC Regulation Put In Place For The World Cup That Only Serves To Kill The Fan Experience of the Day:

No paying spectator can leave the stadium's grounds during a World Cup match. If you want to leave at any point, they expect you to buy another ticket to come back in. If you ask me, that is just blatant discrimination against those fans who are unwilling to stand in line during the lunch break to get overpriced buckets of KFC or lukewarm roti at the concession stand, and who'd rather pop out to the park for a quick joint to liven up the afternoon run chase.

-- It's nice to see Russel Arnold keeping alive the long-standing Sri Lankan tradition of "fielding at least one player who looks like he has recently been through a famine." Arnold has taken the role over from Upul Chandana, who had held title for years with a face that seemed almost custom-built for a World Vision ad. I think his bio picture was even Photoshoped to remove the buzzing flies.

-- Sachin Tendulkar has really mastered the art of the memorable entrance. He comes out of the pavilion and onto the field at the just the right moment, strolling at a perfect pace; slow but determined. He crosses the outgoing batsman early, close to the boundary, so he can bask in the lone limelight for as long as possible. He seems to time it so that his name is announced over the P.A. about halfway through his walk, a steady roar building around the stadium as spectators turn their heads to see a diminutive legend in the flesh. It doesn't matter how badly his form may be, or how old he might get, he makes every trip to feel like a special occasion for the fan; a true experience; an event.

And then… he gets bowled for a duck by Sri Lanka's fourth best bowler.